By Cy Wakeman
If you want to drive ownership and accountability at work, Cy Wakeman is going to help.
About No Ego:
No Ego: How Leaders Can Cut the Cost of Workplace Drama, End Entitlement, and Drive Big Results is the third book by New York Times bestselling-author, Cy Wakeman.
About Cy Wakeman:
Wakeman founded Reality Based Leadership, a company devoted to helping create better workplace performance by "teaching employees to turn excuses into results and transform unhappy workers into accountable, successful members of the workforce." (realitybasedleadership.com)
Summary and Review:
In No Ego, Wakeman introduces her "reality-based approach" to improving leadership effectiveness and employee accountability:
Reality-Based Leadership is about . . . a simple approach, backed by science, using intentional mental processes and higher consciousness to reduce drama and eliminate emotional waste. . . . Ultimately, leadership is about manifestation of the truth by directly confronting reality. p. 24
No Ego questions ideas of employee engagement that place ultimate responsibility on the employer. That's not to say companies and leaders are off the hook. She has plenty of insight for them. What Wakeman does -- that is so refreshing -- is raise the value of employee responsibility, accountability, and readiness to meet change.
She will help you say, "Good-bye!" to coddling employees and playing defense when it comes to communication, employee engagement and employee satisfaction. She will ask . . . no, she will demand that employees take responsibility for the stories they tell themselves at work and about work. Why? Because our stories drive our behavior.
Wakeman describes herself as a "drama researcher." She is determined to help you surface workplace drama that creates "emotional waste." As noted, Wakeman will ask employees to ask questions of the stories they are telling themselves and the company, the situations, and the people with whom they work that rub them the wrong way. Employees need to "edit [their] stories and eliminate the emotional churn that [muddies] the waters and obscures reality." She will show you how to do that.
If at this time I am causing you to conjure up images of command and control or "my way or the highway," you can dismiss those thoughts. No Ego is not a one-sided polemic for the boss and against the employee. It is a research-aided attempt, leveraging behavioral psychology, to create a business culture that thrives on face-to-face conversations, personal responsibility, accountability, and the readiness necessary to compete in a changing environment.
As she notes, "a core philosophy of Reality-Based Leadership is Stop Judging, Start Helping. " p.4. At the same time, if employees are not willing, they should be asked how they intend to start cooperating. "An important Reality-Based Leadership mantra that bypasses ego is "Stay in joy or go in peace." p.151.
I always recommend that leaders work with the willing. Buy-in means "I am willing." Like accountability and engagement, it's a choice. It's a declaration of commitment and the first step toward action. The leader's role is to discover those who have chosen to buy in and then to work with the willing to create great results. p. 149
No Ego is a book that favors stressing employee accountability over employee engagement, as responsibility for the latter often falls on the employer. I especially appreciated -- and agree -- with her thoughts that not all employee feedback is equal or equally important.
Engaged employees are an invaluable asset. But the key question is not "Is employee engagement good?" but rather "Does employee engagement truly drive results?" It's not engagement but accountability that gets the credit for good results." p. 77
No Ego grew on me. The more I read it, the more I liked it. By the time I was done, I had to give this book 5 stars. Yes, I take issue with some aspects of her behaviorist approach, evolutionary assumption, and thoughts of an impersonal "kind universe" (p. 52). The heart makes up stories because the heart needs help (Jeremiah 17:9), evolutionary theory makes allowance for the strong, not the kind; and the kindness in the universe reflects the benevolence of its creator (Psalm 145:9). That said, this is necessary, especially in a day when both social vision and "employee engagement" want to point the finger of responsibility somewhere else.
I gave this book five stars for five reasons:
1. Theory: Wakeman pushes back against the traditional models of change management. She knows the theories that foster much of conventional wisdom (Lewin, 1948; Bridges, 1979; Kotter, 1996) thereby lending more substance to her arguments against them and for action, responsibility and fluidity "in the now." (c.f. Chapter 7, "Change Management Is So 20th Century"). No Ego focuses on business readiness in favor of change management. p. 121.
2. Sticky concepts: Emotional waste, Driving your BMW (Bitching, Moaning, Whining)
3. Tools: Chapter 3 - SBAR Situation; Backround; Assessment; Recommendation. p. 57ff. Seh provides a 30-page tool-box at the end of No ego.
4. A necessary mindset: Wakeman champions responsibility, accountability, and commitment. "If you're going to get great results, there can't be an option that allows people to stay and sabotage or to stay and hate." p. 150. "People need to get super comfortable with the role of being informed, not consulted." p. 151.
5. A new employee metric: Current Performance (How am I doing today?) + Future Potential (How am I preparing for what's next?) - (3x) Emotional Expense (Amount of emotional waste and drama) = Employee Value
Quips and quotes:
1. On happiness and engagement: Your happiness/engagement is not correlated to your circumstances but to the amount of accountability you take for your circumstances. I think of Paul's words in Philippians 4:12-13 Paul learned to be content no matter the circumstances.
2." What does great look like?" The story Cy Wakeman shares on pages 9-10 is, in my opinion, worth the price of the book. It is, in illustration, the book in a nutshell.
(see chapter 5 and her summary on page 85).
3. On drama at work Drama [at work] generates emotional waste. p. 15 and many other places as well.
4. Ego Ego loves a good ride in the BMW (bitching, moaning, and whining). p. 28.
5. What great leaders do: Great leaders make reality conscious and visible so that action can be intentional, not accidental. p. 50
6. On delegation: "Delegation is a great way to encourage accountability development." p. 106
7. On giving feedback:> "I really hammer this point with leaders: 'Feedback short. Self-reflection long.'"