by tom chiarella
Tom Chiarella will tell you that he does not have a horse in the race when it comes to coaching, but he offers some helpful words for those who are interested in mounting their own life-coaching pony.
About the author:
Chiarella is Emeritus Professor of English at DePaul University and long-time writer at-large for Esquire, where he profiled celebrities, athletes and political figures. He has written for The New Yorker, Golf Digest, Outside, Wire.com, BleacherReport.com, Elle, Fashion, O: The Oprah Magazine, and Runners World.
The book in a sentence (or two):
Tom Chiarella gives us street-level view of five Life Coaches and their working lives. These are individuals paid to pay attention to the interest and behaviors of one client at a time and help them create positive change through consultation and guidance (not advice).
My quick take on Becoming A Life Coach
I appreciated Chiarella’s book in that it provided a coaching primer by looking at and listening to coaches, not famous, but all effective enough to earn their living from it.
Overview and Analysis:
The author gives what the front flap promises: a candid portrait of this relatively new career (it may not have existed thirty years ago) that that changes lives. He offers this look for anyone considering the coaching path.
My Takeaways:
1. Purpose over popularity: Choose purpose over popularity when it comes to your coaching work (Pervis Taylor, 25).
2. Where to focus: Focus on where your problem lies… where your barrier lies (Farrell Reynolds, 45).
3. Logistics: Consider a prescribed time; for example, eight weeks. One session per week. One exercise per session, a different exercise for each client (Farrell Reynolds, 45).
4. End the session with evaluation: Reynolds always asks his clients to critique every session a little bit: “Was there something I missed? Is there something that is not resonating with you?” A life coach should end every phone conversation with a question: “How has this met your expectations and your needs? With the time we have left what do you want to see out of it?” (Farrell Reynolds, 60–61).
5. Reynold’s Four Rules for Business: Rule one: Know your market. Rule two: Know your product. Rule three: Know the appetites of the market and how your product satisfies them. Rule four: Continually redefine how you inform the marketplace of this product (54–56).
6. What are you learning toward? Help your clients lean toward that something that change brings. Onward. Don’t lean away from the change rather toward it (Amy Moser, 76–77).
7. Actions I’m taking:
What questions do I need to ask myself to get me out of my own place of rhythm frustration? Since taking the president’s role at LBC, I am adjusting to new work rhythms.
Create a document that explains the “terms and conditions” of my coaching: Schedule We will meet ___ weeks and reevaluate. You schedule the time. Work between sessions.
Always ask the person I am coaching to critique every session: Has this session met your expectations and your needs? Was there something I missed? Is there something we are doing that is not resonating with you? With the time we have left, where I can offer the best help?
My coaching plan: (1) Identify where the problem/challenge lies; (2) What’s holding you back? (3) Let’s do the hard work to identify this. (4) It’s your time, what do you want out of it? (5) You set the appointment. That’s your job, not mine.
The author piqued my curiosity about this book:
The Portable Coach: 28 Sure Fire Strategies For Business And Personal Success by Thomas Leonard
Words to ponder:
What is a life coach? Life coaches are individuals who make themselves available for consultation and guidance. They are experts in helping others create positive change in their lives or careers (2-3). Any life coach will tell you: They are not a friend. They may add: Not a mentor. Not a therapist. Not a spiritual guide. Not a teacher. But they do operate in the territories of these human relationships.
A coach’s responsibility: Leonard suggested that it is the responsibility of every coach to be able to cogently define what a life coach does for a client.
Recommendation:
As one whose job includes coaching and who coaches others outside the “9-to-5,” I appreciated the perspective that comes from five other coaches (from diverse backgrounds) and from Chiarella, who by his own admission does “not have a horse in the race” (17).
